


consider me an angel

by unusannus



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Lena Luthor Finds Out Kara Danvers is Supergirl, Months, Protective Kara Danvers, Slow Burn, i'm not doing okay, kara and lena...aka masters of going on a first date without knowing it's a first date, perhaps more plot than necessary, there are so many parallels within this it's not even funny, this has taken months to write my friends, this story went everywhere and also nowhere
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-03
Updated: 2019-11-13
Packaged: 2020-10-04 06:15:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 16,627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20466362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unusannus/pseuds/unusannus
Summary: A certain heartbeat is what helped a young Kara fall asleep, but she's always wondered: who did it belong to?*ABANDONED*





	1. there is blood in the sand, in the clouds

**Author's Note:**

> this is the longest fic i have ever written! i have absolutely no idea how i had the willpower to write it, but the idea came to me months ago and i just knew i had to do something with it. all in all, there will probably be 4-5 chapters to this and 13k+ words. this is really just the prologue.
> 
>   
i was really nervous to post this first chapter, but i hope you enjoy!

Destroyed.

Annihilated.

Ruined.

Whatever you want to call it, but Krypton was dead. 

The planet that Kara had called home for more than a decade was gone. The ashes now floating in the endless void of space.

In her last moments of staring at her home she was placed in a pod by her parents, promising her that she was going to be safer where they were sending her. She didn’t want to go she yelled at them, begged them to come with her so she’d feel less alone. As she stared into their fatigued faces covered in the debris of their fading planet, she studied their features, trying to commit them to her memory because she didn’t want to forget them, no matter where she was going. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she recounted the memories of Krypton that would be ripped out of her hands soon. She pressed her palm against the glass and her parents did the same, she whispered, “ I love you.” one last time.

Before she could see them say it back her pod sped out leaving the orbit of Krypton in a matter of seconds

__________________

The thing about space was that it was completely silent. No stray sounds or voices to accompany Kara in her solitude. All she could hear was her own breathing, which was suddenly quickening in pace as she realized what had just happened.

Her home.

Her planet.

Removed from existence forever.

A panic attack threatened her as her emotions began to overwhelm her. Her breath hitched and her heart began pounding so loud she swore someone a million light years away could hear it, and if they could she wondered why they couldn’t just come and save her.

Her throat tightens as tears began to roll out once again and she sobs.

She sobs for her mother and father who have lost their daughter, their pride and joy. She sobs for her friends on Krypton who are also gone now, never having had the chance to grow up. She sobs for Kal-el who is just a baby and will not remember his loving parents or the unique foods and colors that his home had to offer. Mostly, though, she sobs for herself as selfish as it sounds. 

The youngest member of the science guild and esteemed daughter of Zor-el and Alura and yet now none of that means anything. One of the last remaining survivors of Krypton and she doesn’t want that role, she doesn’t want all the responsibility of keeping her culture alive because even if Kal-el also survived he would never know their home like Kara did. His kryptonian would always have that certain twang of someone who didn’t grow up surrounded by the language. His understanding of the animals like H’raka and Zuurt would be limited to hand drawn sketches and word of mouth that all came from Kara, who would, as time went by, soon forget them herself.

She sobs and no one can hear her.

_______________

The Danvers family was the definition of your average American family. They had normal jobs and a normal house with normal lives, and that’s why Kara hated them. She hated that they were happy living their normal lives because her arrival meant that their normalcy would be deterred. Their whole world would be turned upside down as hers had. She loathed herself for this simple fact.

Her self-hatred grew when she found out that Kal-el (or Clark now) had already grown up and become Superman. She had been stuck in the phantom zone for so long she had lost all sense of time and didn’t know it had been 24 years. She had failed at the one mission she was given before her parents sent her away. Kal had no one to help him learn of his lost home or to be his only true biological family. The weight of the world was put on his shoulders and she had not been there to lessen the burden. 

Then there was Alex. 

Kara was sure that Alex hated her with every fiber of her being the minute she entered their house. She wasn’t entirely sure of the reason until Alex took it upon herself to inform her.

“Because you took my parents away from me!” 

That stunned Kara, making her want to retort and say that actually her parents were gone, but she didn’t think that would help the situation. Instead, she bit her tongue and let Alex get rid of her anger for the moment. For the next few weeks she avoided Alex as much as possible so as to not cause her any more stress. Kara was also fairly certain that having a super-powered sibling wasn’t an easy thing to get used to, so she kept her struggles dealing with her new abilities to herself, already aware of how much trouble she had caused. 

Her nightmare were also kept to herself. Nightmares of seeing her planet explode again and again as if someone was pressing rewind and slowing it down each time. The screams of her people ringing in her ears every time she woke in a cold sweat, breathing heavily. She would always try to calm herself down, not wanting to wake Eliza and Jeremiah or worse, Alex.

On one particular night that she had the same terrifying vision, she wept quietly because this one was particularly painful since it featured only her parents’ deaths. She never saw them actually die, but she could picture it so clearly. Their faces pinched in agony as they disintegrate into nothing.

She had woken up halfway through a panic attack and a sensory overload due to her super-hearing. All the sounds of nature and a bustling downtown on a Friday night were paralyzing her to her bed. It was just too much.

She vaguely heard some shuffling from the bed across the room and before she knew it, Alex was pressed up against her side, “Hey, what’s wrong?” She asked in a worried tone. This was the first time she had spoken to Kara willingly since their argument. Her right arm hugged Kara with a love she had never shown before this moment.

Kara just shook her head and said nothing as she pressed her hands over her sensitive ears. Her throat felt raw when she did speak, “T-The sounds - too loud.” she stuttered out, glancing at Alex. Alex sighed, trying to think of a solution that didn’t involve waking her mom and dad. They didn’t need more to worry about right now.

She could feel a light bulb go off in her head as she came up with a risky idea. “Kara, hey look at me,” She grasped Kara’s chin and forced her to make eye contact, “You’re okay, I promise, just…” She trails off, thinking then a light bulb goes off in her head, “ Listen to all the sounds and pick out one, okay?” She repeats, “Just one that makes you feel calm.” 

Kara nods shakily, closing her eyes, letting unshed tears spill out. She flicked through all the sounds buzzing around her head like she was finding the perfect TV channel. A baby crying, a car alarm going off, and drunken yells of people leaving a club. She didn’t like any of them.

Then, to her surprise, Kara caught the steady thumping of someone’s heartbeat. 

Ba-dum

Ba-dum

Ba-dum

It was low and swiftly coaxed her out of her grief-stricken state of mind. A wave of peacefulness spread all throughout her body as she focused on it. The consistent rhythm was almost enough to put her back to sleep once she began breathing in time with it. It was so different from the few heartbeats she had heard before. She opened her eyes to the same worried expression Alex had on before. 

“I think I’m better now.” She assured her. 

Alex still questioned, “Did you find the one?” 

Kara gave her a small smile despite her cheeks being stained with dried tears, “Yeah, sorry for waking you.” Kara apologized. As an answer Alex gave Kara another side hug, squeezing her slightly before crawling back to her own bed. 

Kara’s thoughts wandered back to the heartbeat while she slipped the covers over herself once again. She tried to find it again, and she did. She sighed happily because now it seemed she had something that would help her fall asleep, always.

The nightmares persisted and when they did Kara looked towards that special heartbeat. Her curiosity got the better of her which led her to look (or really hear) around the neighborhood to find out who it belonged to. But it seemed she had no luck and that certain someone would just remain a mystery, one that helped her sleep much easier.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading :D i appreciate any kudos or comments because they give me that sweet validation!!
> 
> ok love y’all byeee <3


	2. all i know is a simple name (and everything has changed)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is where things to start to pick up.
> 
> we meet lena. kara and clark have a disagreement and alex is there to make it all better.

A year had passed and Kara had no need for the antidote that was that heartbeat, her anxiety was getting better at being controlled and she hadn’t felt the need to listen to it for a few weeks. Out of interest she wondered if she could still find it after going so long without it. It seemed that she couldn’t, either that or the person to whom it belonged to had moved away. The suburbs were becoming a less popular place to live in after all. Kara felt a surprising amount of sadness over this revelation. She had hoped to find some way to thank this mystery person, even if it might’ve been kind of hard to tell them without revealing she was an alien refugee on earth.

_______________

As an adult she’d soon forgot about the person and their heartbeat as she grew to control her powers with ease which led her to become Supergirl. This heroic persona was now the protector of National City, but she was also just Kara Danvers and Kara Danvers was going to be helping to interview the infamous Lena Luthor. Since she wasn’t really a reporter herself she would be accompanied by Clark.

It was intimidating, to say the least, she knew that right now tensions were high between the young Luthor and National City, especially since the explosion of a bank carried out by people proclaiming they were doing it in the “Luthor’s name” which was almost certainly referring to Lex, but many still connected it to Lena in some way or another.

The high rise company building was visible to Kara even when she was thousands of feet in the air flying (she found that that was a faster way of transportation and took advantage of it whenever possible) As she flew around the entrance she landed in a nearby alley and changed into her normal clothes with super speed. Clark had already texted her saying he was waiting inside so she shuffled in quickly.

The interior was all monochrome. The only splash of color Kara noticed was on the slim laptops of the bustling interns grabbing coffee for their superiors and she wasn’t sure if that really counted. She spotted Clark almost immediately and gave him a small wave as she strode over to him. 

“Hey, Clark!” She greeted happily, giving him a hug which he gratefully returned.

“Hi Kara, ready to go in?” He asked her. She nodded, allowing him to lead the way to the elevator. 

Kara makes small talk while the elevator went up, “ Have you ever met Lena before?” She inquired. She knew that her brother was nefarious for unspeakable crimes but his sister was rarely seen, opting the life of a recluse, that is, until she had to step up to become the CEO. 

Clark scoffed like he was offended, “No, you know I’ve only met her brother,” She sees his eyes stare directly at the doors, not daring to look away. She regrets asking, knowing that it was, for lack of a better word, a sore subject. 

He continues on, “But I wouldn’t doubt that she’ll follow in his footsteps, sooner or later.”

Kara furrows her eyebrows, tilting her head and feeling a sudden need to defend this woman she had never met before.

“What makes you say that?” She challenges. He raises his eyebrows, surprised at her little outburst. He’s at a loss for words before they’re interrupted by the elevator dinging, indicating that they had arrived at the top floor where Lena’s office was located. Clark huffs, mad at himself for not thinking of a quick reply. 

Kara just giggles and steps out of the elevator, “Come on, we’re going to be late.” She urges him with a grin, motioning to Lena’s office door.

As Clark was catching up to her Kara knocked lightly on the door. A quiet “Come in” led them inside. 

Upon entering Kara noticed that the office was no different in decoration from the rest of the building which strangely saddened her. She always thought that a personalized office made her work day more fun. 

Lena Luthor stood up from her chair and shook both their hands as they stood across her desk. 

Kara knew how she looked from professional photos taken at yearly galas and even the rare paparazzi photos and yet her expression quickly turned flabbergasted once she actually got a look at the woman in person. She was beautiful, actually that was definitely an understatement.

She was sure there wasn’t a word that could describe her in English or Kryptonian.

“Hello, Mr. Kent, “ She eyes him warily, “I see the Daily Planet sent their best,” She pauses briefly, “And you are…?” Her voice trails off, looking pointedly at Kara, raising one perfectly manicured eyebrow. It took Kara a few seconds to realize that she needed to introduce herself. 

“Oh, um I-I’m Kara, Kara Danvers.” She states, nervously pushing up her glasses out of habit. She adds, “I’m not with the Daily Planet, I’m with CatCo, actually.”

Lena smirks, “That’s a publication not known for it’s hard-hitting journalism,” Kara gulpes, suddenly feeling small and very intimidated by the business woman. 

“I’m just tagging along for today.” She informs Lena. 

Lena chuckles, shaking her head lightly at Kara’s answer. Kara let out a breath, she was starting to feel star-struck, in a way. Luckily, Clark swooped in to carry the conversation forward. 

“I’m sure you’re a very busy woman, so let’s get started, shall we?” He said. Lena gave him a puzzled look as if saying Oh, so you think you’re in charge which made Kara feel certain...things. 

Lena spoke with edge as she steely stared at Clark, “Yes, let’s move this along,” Her tone turned hostile, “Why don’t you ask me what you really want to ask me: Did I or did I not orchestrate the bombing of the National City bank.” 

Clark looked taken aback, but showed no means of backing down, “Well, did you?” Kara turns to Clark, shocked at how easily he had asked if she had committed an act of terrorism. 

Lena seems to sense Kara’s surprise and sought to reassure her, “It’s alright Ms. Danvers, I’m quite used to these types of questions” and Kara absolutely did not like that. No one deserved to be seen as something they’re not because of what their family has done. She knew that feeling all too well.

She hardly knew Lena, yet in just a matter of minutes she felt that she was good. A good person who was brought up into the wrong family. 

Lena swiftly turns her attention back to Clark, “You wouldn’t be asking if my last name wasn’t Luthor.” 

The retort sets something off in him, Kara almost thought he was about to whip out his heat vision then and there. She knew this was an irritable spot. Lex had been his friend, his best friend. That was no secret. Clark never saw his breakdown coming. Superman never saw his breakdown coming.

“Ah, but it is, isn’t it?” His jaw tensed, staring her down in defiance.

Lena’s expression of neutrality stumbles into surprise, murmuring “ Some steel under that Kansas wheat.” 

Clark found no humor in her reply. Lena turns her head towards the large window behind her desk as she carries on speaking, reminiscing over her past with Lex, both Supers took this moment of opportunity to lower their glasses and scan her office for anything out of the ordinary.

In those brief seconds Kara let her powers loose. Her breath hitches when her ears catch onto someone’s heartbeat, not just any heartbeat 

It was the heartbeat. 

Oh Rao She thought, that’s coming from Lena.

Lena had been the cure for her nightmares. 

Lena Luthor. 

Clark notices her change in demeanor, how she stiffens and her own heart skips a beat, he shuffles next to her quickly, before Lena can notice. “What’s wrong? Did you find something.” He’s talking so quiet, his lips barely moving as he pretends to pay attention to Lena’s monologue. 

Kara slowly shakes her head and gulps, “N-No, I uh - it was just a fight that was happening outside.” She lies, not quite ready to explain everything to him.

He purses his lips, “Do we need to check it out or…” He left the answer up to Kara.

Kara’s brain short-circuits, forgetting they weren’t alone as she blurts aloud , “No!” 

She instantly presses her hand to her mouth, willing herself to just shut up. Clark gives her a look that said Are you crazy? 

Lena jumps, pulled out of whatever point she was trying to make. “Are you disagreeing with the fact that I thought Lex was wrong, Ms. Danvers?” Her hard gaze pierces through Kara and if she had laser vision Kara would most definitely be dead now. Definitely.

She also thought that death would be better than to be on the receiving end of an irritated Lena Luthor. 

Kara coughs awkwardly, trying to fill the empty space, “Of course not, I just noticed a plane outside that looked like it was going to, uh...crash.” She finished, wincing slightly at how horrible her excuse was.

“You thought a plane was going to crash?” Lena repeats slowly, taking in every word before turning around to look out the window then back at Kara, her expression something akin to disbelief. 

Kara nods, biting the metaphorical bullet and going down with her lie. “Yes.” She says calmly, slightly fidgeting with her fingers.

Lena smirks, something clicking in her mind before feigning a worried expression,“They shouldn’t be flying this low. How did you see it?” 

Kara purses her lips, stalling to give an acceptable answer, “I just - I have 20/20 vision?” It comes out more of a question than anything else. Everything leaving her mouth is sounding so, so much worse than it did in her head. 

You’re digging a hole for yourself

Why did she say that? She’s wearing glasses of all things, albeit fake ones, but that doesn’t stop her from wanting to hit her head against the wall a million times for even trying to fix the already falling apart excuse.

Clark is quick to intervene once again before Kara can botch this interview even more.

“Okay, I think we can cut the interview short here, thank you for your time.” He says, already moving to shake a confused Lena’s hands as Kara parrots his action, dumbfounded by her own stupidity.

He leads her to the door, waving goodbye with little effort. 

As they walk back to the elevator, Clark can barely contain his frustration, grabbing Kara’s shoulder to stop her from getting further ahead. “What was that? Why’d you yell ‘No’ in the middle of an interview with a high profile person!” He’s whisper yelling because they’re only a few feet from Lena’s door, his face turning crimson like he’s the one who feels embarrassed.

Kara rolls her eyes, annoyed that he didn’t even wait until they were outside to talk through this. “Oh, like you really care. You were belittling her the second we walked in!” She feels herself grow angrier as she recalls how he had the audacity to act the way he did.

Arriving at the elevator Clark presses the button to go down then turns to Kara, “I was just asking what the people want to know.” He tells her not noticing or just unconcerned with her change in attitude.

“That’s not what journalism is about, the people can be as biased as they want, but you can’t.” 

“So what, now you think you’re a real journalist? You were an assistant for Cat Grant for years before you even entertained the idea of becoming a reporter for God’s sake, so don’t tell me how to do my job.” 

Kara’s face falls. She can’t help but cling to the fact that he used the phrase ‘for God’s sake’. It was always Rao for her, always will be. He would never say that, though. He was essentially from earth at this rate. Another thing on the list of reasons why she would never be the same as him.

She knew her eyes looked red and watery now. He hit a low blow. They both knew that and as much as it annoyed her she still took it hard.

The doors open and they both slip in wordlessly. Clark shifts uncomfortably once they close again. He goes to open his mouth, probably to apologize, but Kara promptly shuts him down, holding a hand up.

“Don’t”

The doors open again soon after the curt reply leaves her lips. She walks out first, not bothering to look back. “I’m flying myself home.” She says under her breath, barely even a whisper that no one else would have caught, but that’s what she hoped for.

She knew that Clark would have heard it anyways.

_______________

Arriving at her apartment Kara collapses on her couch, exhausted from the argument, her mind still reeling from what Clark said.

Was she really ready to become a reporter? 

She sighed into her pillow out of frustration. This was definitely not the time to get cold feet. She dug her hand into the front pocket of her jacket, needing to talk to somebody about this and there was only one person she could trust with it..

On the third ring she picks up, “ Hello?” 

Kara instantly feels herself relax at the voice of her sister, “Hey, I was wondering if you could come over. I need to talk to you about something.” 

Instantly Alex went into her over protective big sister mode, “Why? Is something wrong? Are you okay?”

“Nothing’s wrong. I’m fine, promise, just - can you get here soon?” 

Kara hears shuffling on the other line, “Yeah, I’m on my way now.”

_______________

Alex arrives with a few bags of take out and hands Kara one, a quick peek inside leaves her grinning, “A whole bag of potstickers for me?” She goes to awkwardly side hug Alex who's still holding two other bags.

“Yep, you sounded like you needed a pick me up over the phone.”

They get situated on the couch and Kara pops a potsticker into her mouth before beginning.

“Do you remember when I first came to earth?”

Alex’s eyes acquire a gentler look as she nods , but Kara knows it’s not out of pity, more like edging on proudness.

Kara continues, “And the nightmares I used to have, the ones where I needed to listen to that heartbeat?” Her mind travels back to Lena. It still hadn’t fully set in that she knew the person behind the sound. 

Alex shifts her body to be towards Kara, tilting her head out of curiosity of where this conversation is heading. She hums in agreement before going to drink her coffee she brought.

“I’m pretty sure I know who it belongs to now.” She bluntly states, glancing at Alex for a reaction.

As she’s sipping her coffee she almost chokes, “What? When did you find out? All you did today was go do that interview with Clark to interview…” Alex trails off, forgetting 

“Lena Luthor.”

Alex snaps her fingers, “Yeah, that’s it. You just got home, so all you’ve done today is that interview and you wouldn’t call me unless it had happened today...” Kara watches as Alex struggles to pinpoint who Kara’s mystery person, feeling slightly guilty that she hasn’t told her outright yet.

Alex’s eyes widen, “No.” She gasps.

“I’m not sure what you’re saying no to.” 

“Is it seriously Lena Luthor?” 

Kara sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose in frustration, “Why are you making it sound like such a bad thing?” Her voice grows louder, “I’ve been wanting to find out who it was for years!”

Alex shakes her head, “Are you forgetting what her own brother has done? What he’s done to Clark? To you?” 

Kara lets out a shaky breath, closing her eyes to shove away painful memories.

She opens them again, a determined look in her eyes, “Lena is not her brother, it was clear during the interview that she felt horrible for what he did. All that the company has done now is been a force for good.” Kara finishes, glaring at Alex.

Alex huffs, seeing this conversation going nowhere, “Is this all you wanted to talk about?”

“I’m telling you this as a preface to a really, really dumb thing I did at the interview today.” She speaks quickly, already cringing internally, re-living the moment.

At this Alex brightens since she, as all siblings do, finds it hilarious when her sister’s awkwardness gets the best of her. Pressing the palm of her hand to her chin, she leans closer 

“Do tell.”

“When I heard her heartbeat, I kind of freaked which got Clark’s attention and he asked if I was okay, I flubbed and said there was a fight happening outside which led him to ask me if we needed to stop it so I said no, but loud, like, way too loud.” She glances at a laughing Alex, muffling herself with her hand.

“It’s not funny. Lena heard it and thought I was insulting her somehow!” 

“Were you trying to?”

“No!” Kara shoves Alex playfully but her teasing grin doesn’t cease. She continues, “Clark was not happy with my behavior and once we left he yelled at me like I was a kid. He acted like such a jerk, saying that I wasn’t a real reporter, so my opinion didn’t matter.”

“That’s a little harsh and I’m definitely going to have a talk with him later,” Alex purses her lips, contemplating something before speaking, “I’m not going to try and play Devil’s advocate but-”

“I think that’s exactly what you’re going to do.”

Alex rolls her eyes, “Okay, maybe a little, but you have to put yourself in his shoes, Kara. This is his job, his livelihood. He wants everything to go as smooth as possible. You know better than anyone that being a superhero doesn’t pay the bills”

“He obviously wasn’t thinking about that when he insulted her.” She mumbles under her breath, digging into her bag for another potsticker to calm her nerves. She chews slowly, observing her wooden floor.

“I think you two need to talk this over together.”

“Talking to each other is what got us into this mess in the first place.” Kara groans out, flailing her head back dramatically. 

Alex’s phone starts ringing soon after and before Kara knows it she’s leaving her with two bags of Chinese take-out and heading back to the DEO to question some rogue aliens.

_______________

Morning comes with an email notification on Kara’s laptop. It’s the first thing she sees since she fell asleep on her couch watching funny cat videos which, in all fairness, did brighten her mood considerably. Although, if she wasn’t entirely incapable of feeling pain she would be majorly sore today.

The email in question is from Clark, surprisingly. The subject line is The full article edited, feedback is appreciated. Resisting the urge to ignore it Kara tries to think critically about why Clark would even send her an email when there was no need to. Kara was only tagging along to get a feel for things. Her name didn’t even need to be in the byline. 

Hmmm

It hit her that this is most likely him reaching out to show that he’s sorry, an olive branch, so to speak.

She checks the time on her phone and does some quick math to know that she’s got enough time to call Clark right now.

He picks up almost immediately

“Hey, so you got the email.” He’s speaking quickly, buzzing with nerves, of what kind, Kara’s not sure.

“I did. I - uh - wanted to apologize for yesterday, for ruining the interview.” 

There’s a pause, “Wait -What? Why are you apologizing? I should be sorry, everything I said was way out of line.”

Kara runs a hand through her hair, “ It wasn’t exactly great of me to mess up something that was clearly very important to you, and understandably so.”

Clark chuckles good-naturedly, “It seems we both did things we regret yesterday.”

“Definitely.” She sighs, “Can we be cool now, please? I hate fighting.”

“Yeah, I’m glad you called because I have something else I wanted to talk about.”

Kara raises an eyebrow, “What is it?”

“There’s this gala happening on the weekend that I’m invited to and I can bring a plus one, so I was wondering if you wanted to come?”

Kara can’t help but ask, “Is Lois not available?” 

“No, she’s going out of town to cover a big story and I thought it’d be weird if I just showed up alone.”

“Ah, so I’m only your second choice.” She teases halfheartedly.

“I just thought who better to bring than my soon-to-be favorite reporter.”

Kara agrees once he mentions that Lena is going to be there. She knew the gala would be the perfect opportunity to try and mend things between. She wasn’t sure why she felt so guilty over possibly offending her after only knowing the woman for less than a day. Nonetheless, she was..

Clark gave the information for when and where the event was happening and what the dress code would be before saying his goodbyes, allowing Kara to get ready for work and go through her day.

_______________

It’s after Kara is done with work that she takes the time to go out on patrol as Supergirl. It’s also at this time that she hears some commotion happening in the direction of L-corp. She’s able to catch a few men’s voices saying things like Grab her and Keep her mouth shut which tells Kara that somebody is in trouble. 

That somebody most likely being Lena.

She zooms away quickly towards the noise and as she makes a stop in front of Lena’s office balcony she uses her x-ray vision to see that her office is empty and that they’ve already brought her to an alley with a black van parked suspiciously close.

Kara sets her sights on the scene and goes to pull away one of the men’s hands from Lena’s shoulder. 

“What do you think you’re doing?”

Not giving him time to respond she grabs him by his collar and shoves him against a wall where he slides down comically slow. She turns to see a shocked Lena Luthor and before she can say anything she feels, well, not exactly feels but she can tell by Lena’s hitched breath of shock that the other guy just tried to hurt her.

She sets her eyes on the other man, who is now cradling a broken hand because he seems to have forgotten that Supergirl is indestructible. 

“Ooh, yeah, definitely gonna need to see a doctor about that.”

His face hardens at her light tone and he goes to hit her again for a reason Kara can only describe as his incredibly hurt ego, but swiftly stops his other hand from suffering the same fate with her own. 

Flicking him a little too hard on the head is enough to knock him out cold.

That seems to be all the men there and Kara focuses on assessing Lena for any injuries.

“Ms. Luthor, are you hurt?” She asks.

Lena shakes her head, “I’m fine. Thank you for saving me. Who knows what those goons were going to do to me.”

Kara nods, content with her answer, “I could fly you home if you want?” She struggles to keep her voice from wavering because even as Supergirl she is still subject to rejection, and nobody likes rejection.

“No, that’s alright. I’m sure you wouldn’t want to be seen with me more than necessary.” She smiles sadly, like she knows something that Kara doesn’t and it makes her heart ache in a way she never thought possible.

Without thinking, Kara goes to hold her hand, “I want to make it clear right now that I don’t think you are like your brother. You haven’t done anything to prove otherwise and I believe in judging someone based on their actions, so unless you ever do prove otherwise, I hope our relationship can differ from that of our family members.” She finishes, squeezing her hand in hopes of reassuring Lena that she’s not lying.

Lena’s eyes widen slightly at Kara’s sudden declaration. She’s taken aback for all of 3 seconds before her expression is molded into something more emotionless. She lets go of her hand. Kara’s honestly surprised she didn’t get whiplash from how fast her demeanor changed.

“I appreciate the sentiment, but I’ll just ask my driver to take me home.”

It’s not the answer Kara was expecting. She can’t say she’s entirely surprised that Lena doesn’t seem to believe her when a whole city of people prove that they don’t. And Kara, being the person that should be the most angry at Lena, not caring about her family ties? Well, that’s just crazy ( to Lena, to Kara, on the other hand, it’s common sense to not blame someone for something they didn’t do)

Kara sighs, crestfallen, “I just want to make sure you’re safe.”

“Is this some kind of game, or a ploy to get some information out of me?” 

“What? I - No, of course not! I just don’t want us to be enemies. We can be different, show this city the good we can do as a team, even.”

Lena breathes out a laugh, “You sound quite sure of that.”

Kara gives her a lopsided grin, hands firm at her hips, a combination of Kara Danvers and Supergirl that not many get to see, “I’d like to think I’m a good judge of character.”

Lena seems to consider the offer of a flight back but she still thinks her driver will get her home just as safely. So, Kara makes sure to stay with her out in the front of the building while she waits. 

The driver arrives about 5 minutes later. 

Was Lena seriously going to wait 5 minutes for a driver all by herself? The thought boggles Kara’s mind. There is so much that can occur in 5 minutes, so much.

Kara senses an unfamiliar tug at her heartstrings once they drive away. She makes a note to tell Winn to build another watch that also acts as an emergency call button for Supergirl to give Lena, though she’s not sure she’ll inform him of that last part.

She’s clueless as to whether it’s normal to care for someone you barely know this much, but for some odd reason, She feels a newfound obligation to tear down the walls Lena Luthor had set up for herself, whether it would be as Kara or as Supergirl, she wasn’t quite sure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this will start to get angsty soon, don't worry...that tag was not added by accident hehe
> 
> again, i cannot express my gratitude enough if you are reading this! it's my literal baby and i hope the idea interests you as much as it did to me.


	3. feelings set on fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> get ready for some gay panic followed by some gay softness (enjoy the small fluff while it lasts)

The night of the gala comes soon after Supergirl’s encounter with Lena. 

Kara arrives with Clark whose clad in an all black suit to fit the occasion. While Kara wore an equally black dress.

She spends the first half of the night searching for Lena as Clark excuses himself to catch up with old friends, leaving Kara to question why she was even invited. After half an hour Kara comes to the conclusion that she might’ve decided not to come last minute, dampening her mood since she was really looking forward to mending things between them. She turns to the plethora of food that the event has to offer, namely the shrimp, and gets to work. 

There’s at least 5 shrimp in her mouth when she hears a voice from behind her.

“Didn’t expect you to be here, Ms. Danvers.”

It’s Lena. As Kara stares into her piercing green eyes again she subdues herself from yelling in excitement.

Realizing she hasn’t responded , Kara tries unsuccessfully to swallow down the shrimp without choking, it takes a few seconds but she’s ready to talk even if her face is beet red and she’s slightly heaving.

Kara wipes at her mouth with a napkin, “I’m Clark - err - Mr. Kent’s plus one.”

Lena raises her eyebrows suggestively, “Oh, are you two…” she trails off, hoping Kara get’s her gist.

Kara almost starts choking again, “Oh! Oh, No no no, it’s nothing like that. We’re cousins!” She adjusts her glasses nervously, “I’m actually glad we found each other here. I wanted to apologize for my behavior from our interview. It was entirely unprofessional of me.”

Lena narrows her eyes suspiciously, seeming to find what she was looking for she smiles softly, “Thank you. Apology accepted. Although, I have to say, I didn’t expect you to feel very sorry for what happened.” 

Kara can tell Lena’s deflecting again. A sense of deja vu hits her as she remembers her talk with Lena as Supergirl, the woman seems to believe that she doesn’t have many, or any people on her side. 

Kara crosses her arms confidently, “Well, I did. You’re a human just like any of us and deserve to be treated with respect.” 

Lena chuckles, an amused glint in her eyes, “You know, you remind me of someone I talked to a few days ago. She also had it set in her mind that I was deserving of any good.”

She was talking about Supergirl, right? Kara was almost sure of it, but there has to be other woman that Lena’s talked to and for an unknown reason the thought rubbed Kara the wrong way. 

“I’m glad I’m not the only one who can see the good in you.”

Lena goes to take a sip of her drink, a glass of champagne. Kara can’t help but be entranced by her red lips as they make their way onto the rim briefly. She gulps, suddenly feeling very hot and clears her throat to stop herself from saying something stupid in front of Lena. (again)

In those few seconds a man walks up behind Lena, putting Kara’s senses on high alert as to why he was trying to be so sneaky. She takes a step next to Lena as he slithers to her other side.

“Lena, I thought I lost you.” The man says, in the light Kara can see his neatly trimmed five o' clock shadow in direct contrast to his messy graying hair. His slightly bloodshot eyes and a certain stagger to his footing tells Kara he’s a little more than tipsy. 

Lena frowns, “ I was hoping you had.” 

Kara almost laughs out loud at Lena’s bluntness, but the man doesn’t back down.

“Hey, come on, you don’t mean that. Let’s head back to the hotel and have some fun, yeah?” He slurs, going to rest his hand on Lena’s arm, setting off red alarms in Kara’s mind and she doesn’t care if they’re surrounded by National City’s elite she will break his nose if need be.

“You’re drunk, Edge. Go home. I’m not interested.” Lena tells him, shrugging his hand off.

Still, he keeps going, trying to convince Lena that they won’t do anything crazy and just hang out as friends do, but Kara doesn’t buy it. An idea pops into her mind, an idea so outlandish that she wonders if something was slipped into the shrimp to make her unstable and yet she speaks her mind anyways.

She sucks in a breath, turning to Lena, “ You wanna get out here?” Her eyes pleading that Lena doesn’t think this is weird, that she follows Kara’s lead.

A small sound of surprise leaves Lena’s mouth. Kara just widens her eyes expectantly, hoping Lena sees this as her way out of an uncomfortable conversation. Jack looks confused as well, glancing at Lena to hear her answer.

“Oh, yes of course darling let’s go.”

Now, it’s Kara’s turn to be surprised. 

Darling?

Her blush is still evident on her cheeks as they stepped out the doors of the gala, to distract herself Kara makes sure to send Clark a text that something popped up and she needed to leave. He sent back an ‘okay’ and a 3 crying emojis. Kara resists the urge to roll her eyes at her cousin's melodrama.

When she was done she looked up to find Lena laughing at her, immediately feeling self-conscious of her decision she chuckles nervously. 

“What?”

Lena bites her lip then shakes her head, “Nothing. It’s just...that was quite bold of you Ms. Danvers. I didn’t know you had it in you.”

Kara’s not sure what ‘it’ is exactly but if it means that Lena will keep staring at her like that, then she’ll gladly keep doing ‘it’.

“It’s no problem, really. That guy was a creep.”

“That’s one way to put it.” Lena mumbles under her breath.

Kara does think to ask who he was exactly but she didn’t want to pry too much since Lena might not be ready to share what she hasn’t already done so willingly.

The conversation dies out and Kara stares at the sky wistfully before speaking again, “I didn’t plan this far in my head of what to do once we left,” She pauses, “Do you want to go home - by yourself I mean - obviously not with me.” She stumbles over her words. Something about being so close to Lena seems to inhibit her ability to speak.

Lena looks at her endearingly, like Kara’s usual awkwardness isn’t something to be annoyed over or to feel pity about and it makes Kara’s heart beat so fast she thinks she might collapse.

“I’m almost 100 % sure that Edge will be lounging around somewhere nearby waiting so he can harass me some more, so I’d rather not go home just yet.” 

“Oh, I mean, we could just hang out at a diner for a while if you’d like.”

Lena’s expression turns puzzled, “A diner? What do they have there?”

“Usually junk food”

“I’m not following.”

Kara audibly gasps, “How have you never heard of a diner? They are a staple of American culture!” She grasps Lena’s hand, “We need to get you to one as soon as possible.”

Lena looks mildly embarrassed that she doesn’t know what a diner is, the pinkness on her cheeks much more prominent due to their usually pale color. 

Kara backtracks, not wanting to make Lena uncomfortable, “I-I mean, only if you want to, of course. Sorry for getting a little too ecstatic.”

Lena shakes her head quickly, “ It’s fine, we can go to a diner.” She adds, “ It would be helpful to know what they are, though.” A curious glint in her eyes.

“Well, they’re like restaurants, but way better because they’re open 24 hours a day and serve things like pancakes, hamburgers, milkshakes, basically anything you want.”

Lena wrinkles her nose slightly which Kara finds immensely adorable but bites her tongue to not scare her off even more. 

“I know that it’s probably not your usual style but you can give it a try and if you don’t we can do whatever else you want?” The last part sounding more like a question than a statement as Kara grows more nervous.

Lena nods wordlessly. Kara walks her to her car, opening the passenger door for her with a soft smile. She decided that Noonans was the best place to go.

_______________

The diner isn’t exactly packed but it wasn’t exactly empty either.

Kara picks out a booth in a lone corner and slides into the seat across from Lena. She notices some people’s lingering looks, mostly on Lena and she wishes she could forcefully turn their heads away.

“Are you sure you’re okay here? We can go somewhere else if you want?” She asks, wanting nothing but for her to feel safe.

“It’s fine, nothing I’m not used to.”

Kara’s eyes soften, “It’s not fine. They should just mind their own business.” Her eyes flitting to a waiter over the counter who hasn’t stopped staring, glaring at him until he finally looks away.

Lena cracks another sad smile, “ There you are again with the kindness. Is there something you want, Ms. Danvers?” 

Kara knows this was her attempt to lighten the situation with a joke, to smooth out the crease forming on her forehead and yet she can’t let herself laugh because it’s the second time that Lena has accused her of only being nice for something in return. It lets her see just how deep these insecurities run, whether or not Lena wanted her to see them.

It irritates Kara to no end that Lena has been through as much hardships as she has. She’s only known her for such little time but can already see that she has no trace of evil in her.

“Please just call me Kara.” She tells Lena, trying to stray away from the tense subject.

“Well, in that case you can just call me Lena.”

Kara does grin at this, bashfully lowering her head to stop her face from growing any redder.

A waitress comes to their table as they finish talking, “Hi! Welcome to Noonans, can I take your order?” 

Lena looks at Kara, “I’ll have what you’re having.”

Kara beams, happy that Lena trusts her with this decision , as simple as it may be, “ We’ll have two cheeseburgers with fries and two chocolate milkshakes, please.” She pauses, turning to look at Lena, “Are you allergic to any of that?”

Lena shakes her head no and Kara does a quick phew! gesture once the waitress walks away, if only to make Lena laugh because she’s come to the conclusion that there’s something angelic to it.

The food arrives and as much as Kara wants to dig in, she notices Lena staring at her burger as if it was an alien, poking and prodding at it. A new thought dawns on her.

“Have you ever eaten a cheeseburger before?” 

Lena jumps slightly at the question, looking up at Kara, she looks like she wants to say she has but sighs and defeatedly states, “No.”

Kara sees that she’s sheepish again, “ Hey, it’s fine. This just means you can try it now with a well-versed burger connoisseur, such as me.” She finishes, pointing at herself.

Lena chuckles in disbelief and then glances back down at the burger, “How exactly do you eat this?”

“You just grab it with both your hands at its sides,” She demonstrates, ignoring a confused look from the man nursing a coffee at the counter, “Like so, then just bite into it.”

Lena tentatively grasps the burger, following Kara’s movements. She brings it up to her mouth and takes a small bite, much smaller than Kara’s. After a few moments, her eyes light up and Kara can’t help the dopey grin that shows up on her face as she watches Lena enjoy a burger for the first time. 

“Good?”

All Lena can do is nod as she goes for another, slightly bigger bite. She finishes chewing, “I can’t believe I’ve gone my whole life without ever having eaten one of these.” 

“Can I ask why you’ve never eaten a burger?” Kara questions, quirking an eyebrow.  
“In the Luthor household it was expected to uphold a healthy diet, so no sweets and junk food.”

“Not even in college?”

“No, even though I was free from my mother’s clutches. I still felt conditioned to not do anything she could ever potentially find out about. I mean, even now, I feel like she might burst through the diner doors and reprimand me for eating such unhealthy foods.” She tells this so nonchalantly that Kara almost bursts into tears. 

She knows she’s sensitive, or empathetic as Alex has called it, but could anyone blame her? It was getting harder and harder to see what anyone else saw Lena as. She was seeing the part of Lena that she kept hidden, not that most seemed to care enough to get to know her.

Kara wants to tell her that she’s sorry for her, that she feels pity for her, but she’s not sure that’s exactly what Lena wants to hear. She decides on a different approach.

“ Well, now you have me, and as your new friend I’ll show you all the things you’ve deserved to experience.” 

Lena blinks in surprise, “Friends?”

Kara bites her lip, feeling like she’s overstepped. This is Lena Luthor after all. The CEO of a multi-billion dollar company who could definitely find way better friends than a reporter-who-isn’t-exactly-a-reporter that dragged her out of a gala, even if it was to save her from a relentless man.

Before she can backtrack Lena speaks, tone fragile like she might break if Kara goes back on her words now, “I-I think I’d like that, Kara.” 

Kara.

Lena had actually called her by her first name. 

Not ‘Ms. Danvers.’ 

Just Kara.

And just ‘Kara’ has never sounded so beautiful.

_______________

“ God, that was awful.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, it was way over the top and just not enjoyable. Overall a 3/10.”

Kara laughs at Lena’s stern review of the movie Stitches on netflix. Her and Lena had been hanging out more and more as the weeks progressed and were now on a quest to watch some of the trashiest movies ever made and form their own opinion on them. It was going good. (well, as good as watching really bad movies can go.)

She was happy that Lena was becoming less guarded around her. She hadn’t taken down every single one of her walls, but it was still progress nonetheless.

As the credits roll Kara takes the opportunity to go and re-fill her bowl with more popcorn. Lena grumbles a bit at losing her shoulder to lay on but let her go anyways. 

Upon returning Kara realized that Lena was now standing a few feet behind the couch, chatting on the phone with someone. She was able to catch a few words from Lena’s end.

“Yes, of course, I know what to do with my company, mother.”

Oh, so the other person was her mom. 

Kara tried hard to rack her mind for anything she might know about her. Lillian Luthor was no stranger to the public eye when Lex was still the CEO of L-corp, but as he went down in shambles Lillian was quick to disappear as well, leaving many questions about how she raised her family unanswered.

She snuck a peak behind her and saw Lena’s eyes growing teary while shaky breaths escaped her. She wanted nothing more than to comfort her then and there, but she still wasn’t sure if Lena was ready for unsolicited hugs just yet.

The minute Lena hangs up Kara is ready.

“Everything okay?”

“I’m fine. I think I’ll head home now, actually.” Lena speaks fast, already going to slip off a sweater Kara had lent her when she complained that her house was too cold. 

Kara’s eyes widen before she goes to gently grab Lena’s arm to stop her from changing, testing the waters to see if Lena would accept her physical touches. 

Seeing no move to shove her away Kara lets out a breath, “We don’t have to talk about it, just please don’t leave.”

Lena sighs, resigning to sit on the couch again. Kara follows, keeping a hand on her shoulder. She let’s Lena compose herself, rubbing away unshed tears before she speaks.

“My mother called. She wanted to give me her thoughts, which are really just criticisms, on some new projects that L-corp was working on. I just find it hard to listen to her feedback when all she does is compare me to Lex and say how much better he was than me.” 

“You are not less than your brother. You are good and kind and so much better than he could’ve ever been,” Kara clasps Lena’s hand in hers, “ Whatever your mom says isn’t true, okay?”

Lena nods numbly, and Kara’s sure the words went over her head so she tries the next best thing, opening her arms in anticipation, “Come here.” A moment of hesitation later and Lena is bundled in her hug.

Lena’s stiff at first, but once Kara starts to rub soothingly on her back she relaxes. Her tears flow out soon after and all Kara can do is whisper you’re okay over and over until Lena starts to believe it.

Once she pulls away, (much to Kara’s disappointment) Lena lets out a wet laugh, “I’m sorry. I’m not sure what came over me.”

Kara shakes her head, “Don’t be. We’re friends and friends are there for each other no matter what. I’m here for you, Lena. Always.”

“You know, I’ve never had friends like you before.” Lena sniffles, “Most of the people who I considered friends in the past have, in one way or another, back stabbed me. “

Kara uses the pads of her thumbs to wipe away more tears, “I hope you know I would never do that.”

Lena sighs, looking down at her fingers, “I know.”

Kara smiles at Lena’s admission of trust, “Do you want to go home or keep movie night going?” She asks, hoping she chooses the latter.

“Can we keep watching movies?”

“Of course!”

The night drags on and Kara ponders on if there’s more to the conversation that Lillian had with Lena, but as soon as she wants to prod more she looks down at her shoulder, seeing that Lena had already fallen asleep. She notices how much more peaceful she looks, feeling a sense of sorrow at how tired she must be to fall asleep next to Kara, something she had never done before

Those questions can wait for another day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know that the progression of kara and lena being strangers then to friends is kind of fast and the journey there is glossed over BUT that is because i plan on starting a collection that's just lil one shots of things kara took lena out to do to show her what she's been missing. at this point they've known each other for a few months.
> 
> that'll probably be started after this is finished, though, so bare with me
> 
> EDIT: i changed jack to edge because i realized he’s actually really nice and i felt bad.( let’s pretend he has a beard ok)
> 
> the movie stitches is on netflix but i absolutely do not recommend it (especially if you won't like gore because it's a lot...like A LOT, oh, and also clowns) it was a "horror" film but the story is so weird and cliche and just ugh. i hate it and projected my disgust onto these two fictional characters. as you do
> 
> (ignore the notes that might show up after these, not sure why they're there. it was only for chapter 1)


	4. what am i to do with myself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here comes the angst train!!!

The DEO was quiet and Kara was enjoying the serenity by devouring a box of pizza by herself. It had been a slow day for crimes and she didn’t want to head home just yet, so she took to eating her dinner’ there whilst talking about her day with Alex.

“So, I’ve heard that you’ve been hanging out with Lena a lot lately.”

“Yeah, she’s quickly becoming my best friend.”

Alex looks surprised at that, “Really? Have you told her about how she’s helped you?”

“Uh, No.” She wipes her fingers with a napkin, “It’s hard to find the right time to tell her. The last thing I want is to make things weird between us. I mean, what am I supposed to say ‘Thank you for helping me live my adolescence in peace and also I’m Supergirl ta-daa.” She tells Alex sarcastically throwing jazz hands into the air. 

Alex shrugs, “ Okay, obviously not like that. I just think she deserves to know is all.”

Before Kara can respond an alarm goes off in the building, signalling an emergency. They both jump to their feet, scuffling over to J’onn and Brainy for a debriefing.

“What’s going on?” Kara asks, crossing her arms.

Brainy spins his chair to turn to the women, setting his hands in his signature pose, “It seems there’s been a robbery at National City bank, except this time by a woman. The security camera footage show she has powers of the mind that I can’t quite explain yet so, I ask that you be careful, Supergirl.”

Kara nods and turns to fly out the balcony.

As she arrives she sees the aftermath the woman had left in her path, dozens of people lying on the floor whimpering or yelling at something that wasn’t there. She notices a man cradling his head in his hands by the entrance and goes to talk to him,

“Sir,” She shakes him gently but to no avail, “Sir! Everything is okay now. I need you to tell me what that woman did to you.”

“M-monsters. All the monsters. T-they’re here. Tell them to go away please. Please!” The man grows progressively louder as he speaks and Kara jumps back in shock. 

What is going on?

She sees ambulances start to arrive and let the paramedics take care of the victims as she continues her search. 

A few blocks away she hears the sound of a dumpster being knocked over and flies towards it. There she finally comes face to face with the woman dressed in all black, blonde hair cascading over her shoulders.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t the girl of steel.” She smirks and it reminds Kara of Lena except much less inviting.

“Who are you?”

“I go by psi.”

“What did you do those people at the bank?” 

She looks down at her fingernails, bored. She nonchalantly swings the few bags of money over her shoulder. “Oh, just gave them a little taste of their worst nightmares.”

Kara feels herself getting angrier, clenching her fists at her sides, “ You are not getting away with this.”

Psi laughs, “I believe I already have.” She closes her eyes for a few moments, concentration set on her face and opens them, looking at Kara intently.

Immediately, Kara feels nauseous and crumbles to the ground. The environment around her turns black and filled with stars. At first, the quiet is comforting in a way but before long Kara feels suffocated. She looks around and then down at her legs.

She’s back in her pod.

The same pod her parents had left her in all those years ago. 

She presses a palm against the side, tears welling up in her eyes. She wants to get out but she can’t. She tries punching it and using her laser vision and still nothing. The pod feel like it’s closing in on her, setting her up to stay in the phantom zone for another two decades.

“No, no, no.” She mumbles, her uneasiness growing. 

She blinks.

Now she’s on Krypton.

The planet is burning and people are screaming and crying at the top of their lungs. The tears finally clear from her vision as she observes her dying planet. She can hear a child crying uncontrollably, briefly wondering how far he must be before remembering that with the red sun she doesn’t have her powers. She slowly turns towards her left and sees a boy, no older than 10 hugging himself looking absolutely terrified.

She quickly runs to him, “What’s wrong?” She asks, checking him for any wounds. He replies but it sounds like gibberish to Kara. She shakes her head, “I don’t understand.” He repeats himself, looking more and more annoyed. 

He’s speaking Kryptonian She realizes in her head. As it dawns on her she tries to ask him the same question again, but in her native language. She opens her mouth, and yet the words don’t come out. 

She can’t remember.

She can’t remember how to ask “What’s wrong.” in Kryptonian.

Why can’t she remember?

She tries again. The syllables getting stuck in her throat. The way her mouth wants to move is foreign to her mind. How was this even pronounced? She can’t remember.

In her fury of confusion the boy has disappeared. She searches everywhere, but he’s gone. 

Despite knowing the outcome Kara can’t help but search for her parents. She eventually finds them, next to the area where her pod had left and their huddled together, sobbing. She goes up to them, wanting to provide some comfort. 

Her hand touches her mother’s shoulder and she turns to Kara with disgust in her eyes. 

She yells something at her and, again, Kara is clueless as to what. 

Kara gasps, tears streaming down her cheek, “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” Is all she can muster as her knees buckle underneath her. “ She holds her head in her hands, not daring to look at the faces of people who are long gone.

Kara’s father shakes his head, disappointed at her lack of response. He grabs her chin harshly, forcing her to look up. His lips moving and the snarl never moving from his face.

Their bodies start to disintegrate as they both scream at her. She knows this is when the explosion happens, she had only ever seen it from the safety of being out of its orbit. She palms at her parents' faces, wanting to go with them. She doesn’t want to go back to earth alone.

Not again.

And then she’s back in the alley.

Her mind still reeling, she stumbles trying to stand and sets a trembling hand on the brick wall beside her for stability. Groaning involuntarily, she feels something wet on her forehead and goes to feel it and her hand comes back smeared with blood. That probably explains the major headache.

The tears don’t stop and she’s finding it harder and harder to even breathe. The simple task becoming a laboring job. She knows she’s having a panic attack. She hasn’t had one in so long she forgot how horrible they could be.

It’s like she’s thirteen years old again. 

Without thinking she flies up as high as she can, the tears blurring her view slightly. She closes her eyes and does what Alex had always instructed her to do. 

Pick out one sound

She knows exactly which one.

It’s like a magnet being pulled in one direction as she follows the soothing sound of Lena’s heartbeat. She stops in front of her balcony, taking a leap of faith she taps gently on the glass door, careful not to break it, even in her frazzled state. 

A startled Lena Luthor steps into view, her hair in a messy bun and reading glasses dangerously close to falling off her nose. Maybe it's the drying tears on Kara’s face or the shaky hi she’s able to let out but the glass door slides open almost immediately. They stand facing each other in stunned silence.

Lena breaks it first, “What happened?” 

Kara opens her mouth but she can’t get the words out, instead all she can muster is a sad sob. Lena backs away , not used to seeing the hero so vulnerable, least of all with her. As she composes herself she treads towards Kara slowly, setting a hand on her shoulder awkwardly, 

“Hey, it’s okay.”

Kara shuts her eyes, “No, i-it isn’t.” She hiccups, trying to stop from crying again.

Lena seems to notice the wound on her forehead for the first time, “Oh my god, you’re bleeding!”

Kara doesn’t react as Lena goes to wet some paper towels under her sink and wipes away at the blood that’s starting to dry. She’s so close Kara can see the gold flecks in her green eyes behind her lenses, reflecting the sunset from her balcony window. Kara almost feels like she could fall asleep at how gentle Lena’s actions are and how comforting her heartbeat is.

Lena interrupts her thoughts, “Does it still hurt?’

She lies and shakes her head.

Whether or not Lena believes her she doesn’t probe further, just leads her to sit on the couch. Lena clasps her hands in her lap, for some reason still trying to keep a polite composure.

Kara wants to speak. She really does, but their faces, her parents faces won’t leave her. The complete and utter looks of anger and shame thrown at her. She knew this was psi’s plan, immobolize Supergirl to make her escape.

She also knows that all that she experienced in her mind was just that, in her mind. 

But, Rao, were they real enough to make her question her existence and whether or not she was really as much of a hero as she thought she was if she couldn’t even have saved her planet and family. She couldn’t have even completed their final wish of raising Kal. 

She doesn’t realize she’s silently crying again until Lena hands her another tissue that she gratefully takes.

As she cleans her tears she finally gathers the courage to say something, “ I guess I should probably tell you why I just barged in here, huh?” 

Lena purses her lips, “Only if you want to.”

Even with the permission not to, Kara’s sure Lena’s curious and confused, so she decides to just tell her the truth.

“There was a robbery at a bank by a rogue alien with powers that cause people’s minds to see their worst nightmares. It’s scarily accurate.” She takes a deep breath before continuing, “ I tried to stop her, but she got to me. I saw myself back in the pod my parents put me in and then I saw Krypton,” Her voice cracks, “I saw it die again. Like I was there the entire time.” 

Lena sighs, “You didn’t deserve to see that.”

Kara chuckles self-deprecatingly,“Maybe I did. I mean, I did nothing to save them. I didn’t even know Krptonian.” As she recalls this details, she grows worried, “Why didn’t I know Krptonian?” Her voice comes out soft, like a child who doesn’t want to admit they did something wrong.

Lena’s expressions softens, “ It wasn’t real, okay? I’m sure you still remember.” She gently takes one of Kara’s hands in her own.

Kara runs a hand through her hair, overwhelmed with too many emotions to count, “ Can I - Can I hug you? “

She catches the spike in Lena’s heartbeat at the loaded question and regrets being so forward until Lena scoots closer to her, wrapping her arms around Kara. 

At this Kara thinks that she’s had enough. She’s had enough of people bad-mouthing Lena. She’s had enough of people using her only for personal gain and then throwing her out. She’s had enough of people not seeing how absolutely amazing she is. 

She breathes a sigh of relief, pressing her head to Lena’s chest, listening intently to one of the few things that could ground her. She breathes in time with it. As she falls asleep she doesn’t react to Lena setting her head down on the arm of the couch or to Lena draping a blanket over her.

That night she dreams of snow white skin, emerald eyes and other things that make earth a lovelier place to have crashed into.

_______________

Kara opens her eyes, groggily observing her unfamiliar surroundings. The events of last night catch up to her before she can even find the ability to speak and when she does it comes out as incoherent mumblings, catching the attention of one Lena Luthor. 

She kneels down to be eye level with Kara on the couch. 

“How are you feeling?” She asks nervously, still feeling out of place in trying to help a superhero get through some emotional trauma.

Kara rubs her eyes sleepily and sits up, “Better.” Her voice coming out hoarse.

Lena’s eyebrows furrow, “ I didn’t mean to wake you up. It’s still quite early. I just like to beat the morning rush to work.” She chews on her lip, like she doesn’t know what to say, “Look, I know it might be hard, but if you need to talk about what happened last night, I’m here.” 

Kara stiffens, forgetting for a moment why she was even there, “Yeah, of course.” She rubs the back of her neck, “ I’m sorry for intruding. The last thing you probably expected was letting Supergirl crash on your couch.”

Lena chuckles, “I can think of worse ways to spend my night.” 

Kara blushes, clearing her throat as she turns her tone more serious, “ Really though, thank you for helping me. What I saw was...a lot.” She knew she was dancing around the elephant in the room.

“ We can talk about it more if you’d like to.” Lena tells her, already going to sit next to her.

“ I don’t know it’s just-,” Kara stops, willing herself not to cry. She’s already done it more than enough. “ They looked mad at me and I know it’s not real and I shouldn’t care because they’re the ones who neglected the problems our planet was facing before it was destroyed, but I can’t help but still care about what they think of me, even after they’re long gone. I just wish I knew what I did wrong.” 

Lena nods in understanding, “You know, I was the same for a while about Lex. Even after he had done all those horrible things every time he called me from prison and congratulated L-corp on our recent endeavors… I couldn’t help but feel some sense of happiness at his approval.” She scoffs, “I probably sound insane.”

“No, you don’t.” Kara tells her earnestly.

“ All I’m trying to say is that it’s okay to still seek your parents’ approval to some extent. I’m sure they loved you and what she made you see was just a nightmare, the worst one your mind could conjure.”

Kara sets her chin on her hand and sighs, suddenly feeling very tired from everything that’s happened in the past 24 hours. She clings to the silence that settles over the two, indulging herself once again in Lena’s heartbeat and if there was ever a way that a sound could cause world peace, Kara thinks she’s found it.

“Would I sound like a broken record if I said ‘thank you’ again?” 

“Absolutely.”

“Okay, I’ll just say I’m very…” She struggles a moment to find a synonym for thankfulness (give her a break, she probably has a mild concussion) “... grateful for you, Lena Luthor.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i was sure this was going to be 5 chapters long, but it might be 7 ??? or more idk man i'm not sure.
> 
> hope you guys enjoyed this update! school's been totally kicking my butt lately, so it's hard to find time to write but i'm doing my best!!


	5. something gave you the nerve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oof it’s still sad time in the supercorp household

Life goes on after that. 

Supergirl tries to stay out of Lena’s way and Lena out of Supergirl’s, both not knowing what to make of their unusual encounter.

Kara assumes that Lena has more questions like Why did you choose to come to me specifically? And she’s not sure how to answer that without subsequently revealing her identity.

Her identity.( Another problem)

She wants to tell Lena so badly, she really does, but every time the courage is bubbling up inside her, she withdraws. Unconsciously, almost like a phantom is pulling her away, whispering about how much Lena will hate her for her lies or that she’ll never want to speak to Kara again. Things like that.

Her relationship with Lena as Kara Danvers is fairing no better. It’s gotten harder to see each other, even their lunch ‘dates’ (as Lena had absentmindedly called them once, resulting in Kara almost choking on her fries) are becoming less and less frequent. All a result of Lena wanting to push L-corp in the right direction since very little people see her as more than Lex Luthor’s sister.

Kara wishes Lena would give herself a break for once, to hell with what everyone else thinks, but she knows that Lena won’t stop until she is satisfied, which may very well be never. So, she goes with the flow, directing a tight lipped smile and a stern nod of understanding at Lena whenever she left early or asked for a raincheck almost every time they hung out. As much as it may hurt.

It’s not until Lena swears she’ll actually make it to their not-very-weekly movie nights that Kara is injured on patrol. It’s not too bad, considering it wasn’t kryptonite, but whatever alien bazooka the criminal was using hurt, a lot.

He was able to get a direct hit onto her stomach, definitely leaving some bruises, but injuries be damned if Kara thinks she’s going to miss one of the few times Lena actually has time for her. She shrugs off Alex’s plead to take a few minutes under the sun lap, opting to leave the criminal to the police and the alien weapon to the DEO before flying off home to prepare for Lena’s arrival.

Movie night is going great, perfect, even, until they finish their movie and Kara stretches her arms above her head, yawning, the consequences of being up so late catching up to her.

She hears Lena gasp and ask, “Is that a bruise?” She squints, inching her face closer, “Err, multiple bruises?”

Kara freezes, her arms still in mid air as she glances down at her stomach and yep, her shirt had ridden up just enough for the aftermath of her little tumble from beforehand to be on full display for Lena.

She drops her arms quickly, her mouth moving a mile a minute, already stuttering out a half baked excuse, “ I-I, uh, It’s not serious, just from tripping over my...couch. It doesn’t hurt.”

Lena’s eyes widen, her hand unconsciously going to Kara’s shirt and lifting it up even more than before, ghosting over the black and blue on her abdomen. It makes Kara’s heart skip a beat, feeling Lena so close to her. 

Lena pulls back suddenly, her cheeks flushing as she realizes what she was doing, “I think it is serious. How did this happen, and don’t say you tripped. I already know that isn’t true.” She tsks.

Kara bites her lip. How was she supposed to tell Lena the truth without exposing herself?

Lena’s concern radiates off her in waves as she turns protective “If somebody did this to you, tell me. I swear they’ll pay for it.”

Kara smiles sadly. The urge to tell Lena returns. She can’t even imagine how Alex would react to her exposing her secret identity to Lena, but she’s not sure if she even cares.

She appreciates Lena being so worried over her well-being when, in reality, Kara could hold her own better than anyone she knew. She sighs, deciding that there was no use in hiding anymore, not when it meant keeping the most important person in her life in the dark.

“Kara, please tell me what happened.”

Kara brings a hand to the rim of her glasses, doing her best to make eye contact with Lena, “There’s something I need to tell you.”

Lena nervously chuckles, unfamiliar with the serious expression on Kara’s face, “You’re scaring me. What is it?” 

She takes off her glasses fully before undoing her ponytail with shaky hands, “I’ve wanted to tell you this for so long, but it felt like there was never a right time to and I-I know we’ve been friends for only a few months, but you’re my best friend and I don’t know how I would live the rest of my life if you weren’t in it.”

She undoes the first few buttons of her shirt, revealing the crest for the House of El, “Lena, I am Supergirl.”

As she finishes her improvised speech she looks up at Lena. An emotion she’s never seen before is present in her eyes. She grips the mug of tea like her life depends on it, knuckles turning white and Kara’s can’t help but be worried that she’ll cut herself if it breaks.

Lena keeps her voice steady, in direct contrast to her quivering hands, “Were you ever planning on telling me?”

“Yes, of course.” Kara tells her with no hesitation.

“Then why didn’t you? I still wouldn’t know if you hadn’t been so careless with yourself.” There’s no bite in her tone, just an eerie calm.

Kara looks away, “I was scared.”

“Of what?” 

“Of losing you. “

Lena sighs, looking exhausted beyond her years. She stays quiet, processing everything she’s heard.

“Please say something.” Kara pleads

Lena gazes back down to Kara’s stomach with a sorrowful look, “So, those bruises…” She trails off.

“They’re from a criminal I put away earlier today.” 

Lena nods sagely, “Why did you still decide to come to movie night? You could’ve just cancelled.” Her eyes look guilty for something she didn’t do.

Karas expression softens, “I wanted to see you. I wasn’t about to leave my best friend hanging.” She gives Lena a sad grin.

Lena sets down her mug of tea that Kara bought her as a joke because it said World’s Okayest Boss on the side. Kara fights the urge to wrap Lena’s hands in her own afterwards, a glossy look in her eyes, “God, after all the times I’ve walked out on you, you still want to be with me?” She shakes her head at Kara in bewilderment.

“Why wouldn’t I? I don’t care about how often we see each other, even though I’d like it to be more frequently, because as long as I have you, then I know I’ll be okay.”

Lena chokes out a sob, her composure finally breaking, “You can’t do that, Kara.” 

Kara flails her hands, exasperated, “Do what? Care about you?” She feels like she’s on the verge of tears as well, but fights to keep them at bay. “Lena, I don’t care if you’ll hate me for this secret, but I don’t think I could ever hate you. So, if you want, you can leave and never talk to me again, but know that I’ll always be on your side.” 

Lena stands abruptly, hoarsely announcing, “I need some time to just...be alone, please.”

Kara’s mouth falls slightly agape, feeling like she’s grasping at straws now, “ What? I-” She stops herself, knowing that this time it’s best to let Lena go, staying silent as Lena she slips her shoes back on and heads towards the door.

Kara watches the door slam shut, standing up herself. She’s not sure why she stops inches in front of her door, hand on the doorknob, but she does. The tears finally fall as she stares at the only thing stopping her from seeing Lena.

With her super hearing she detects the signature clacking of Lena’s heels on the floor as she walks to the elevator. She listens closer, yearning to catch her heart beat once more, leaning her forehead on the door, closing her eyes tightly.

She swears she can hear Lena crying, too.


	6. nursing on a poison that never stung

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short and sweet lil chapter of lena’s pov. enjoyyy <3

Lena knows she can be somewhat of a workaholic, okay, maybe not somewhat, she just is a workaholic. It’s what she does best. Whether it’s her swift fingers tapping away at the computer or drowning herself in board meetings, it’s where she knows she has power and control. That’s why after Kara had told her that she was Supergirl, she had scheduled her flight to London, where she would work on expanding L-corp , much earlier than planned. The sudden change of plans was confusing to her assistant, Jess.

“But Ms. Luthor, the associates asked that you meet them next month.”

“I know they did, but I want to speak now, and if they have a problem with that, tell them they can kiss this deal goodbye and forget about doing business with L-corp ever again.”

Jess had been quick to do just that and they had agreed, so she was leaving tonight.

Lena felt no need to inform of her impromptu trip to Kara, or anyone, really. All the people she had met through Kara, her so-called friends, had lied to her just the same. 

The flight there was quiet. Her private jet offered little solace, despite it providing her with materialistic pleasures, in her heart of hearts she knew that all she truly wanted was her best friend back.

A small part of her wishes Kara had just kept on lying, if only so she could still be with her and see her without thinking of Supergirl. The whole ordeal had left a bad taste in her mouth. 

Her mind wanders to the first time she met the heroine who saved her from a kidnapping. Thinking back on it now, she can see the Kara in Supergirl, in the way she carries herself. The slight awkwardness when she had asked Lena for a flight home and her insistence to stay with her to make sure she got home safe. It just screamed Kara, making it that much harder to direct any negative feelings towards her when she had been so unwavering in her support for Lena as both personalities.

Lena knows that most likely, in the end, she would forgive Kara. It was just a matter of time. But that didn’t stop her from wanting some space. It’s not everyday your best friend reveals her secret superhero identity to you.

Once she arrives she barely has time to drop off her luggage in her suite before she’s rushed to a meeting with potential investors. 

The first day in London is as hectic as it can get and Lena arrives back to her hotel feeling exhausted. It didn’t help that on top of all her sadness having to do with Kara, a certain businessman she didn’t even know the name of had taken it upon himself to man-splain her own projects to her. Safe to say, he’s not keeping his job for very long.

She collapses on her bed with a heavy sigh. She had only taken off her heels, too tired to undress completely and do something sensible like shower. With little thought she pulls her phone out, quickly entering her password and going to call someone.

A few rings later a confused voice picks up.

“Hello?”

Lena’s breath hitches, eyes widening as the realization sets in that she unconsciously dialed Kara. She had become so accustomed to coming to her when she felt like the entire world was against her.

She hastily whispers a few curses under her breath, Kara no doubt hearing each one even without her super hearing. 

“Uh, yeah, it’s me.” Great. Nice one Lena. Could you be any more awkward?

“Wow, I wasn’t expecting you to call. Isn’t it like midnight over there?” 

“I wasn’t really planning to…” She trails off, wincing internally, the guilt for not telling Kara she was leaving National City finally coming to stab her in the back. 

“Heh, that’s okay.” She pauses. Lena can imagine the look of contemplation on her face as she tries to think of what to say that. If she wasn’t so confused by her own actions, she probably would’ve ‘awwed’ aloud. 

Kara continues, “Are you okay?”

“Why would you ask that?” 

“You hate phone calls unless they’re absolutely necessary. You always told me that if I wanted to talk we should just get together or even facetime.”

Lena chuckles, not feeling deserving of being someone Kara knew like the back of her hand. “I’m not sure why I called.” Her voice suddenly quivering. 

Kara seems to think she’s the cause of Lena’s change of emotions, “If you don’t feel like talking to me, I understand.”

Suddenly sitting upright in her bed, Lena is quick in her response, “No! No, you’re fine it’s just…”

“Just…?”

Lena sighed, “It’s been a tough day, and for some reason I called you because you always made me feel better, and now…” She tiredly rubs her face, “Now I don’t know. It feels like I don’t even know you. ” She says truthfully.

“I was hoping we could talk after you got back from your business trip, but I could fly over if you want? It would only take like 5 minutes.” She tells Lena matter-of-factly.

Lena’s eyes widen, forgetting for a simple moment that she was not only speaking to Kara, but to Supergirl as well, them being one in the same.

Kara backtracks almost immediately, “I-I mean- I could- Um-” 

Lena cuts her off. “ It’s okay, Kara. I know now, remember?” It pains Lena immensely to know that Kara was scared to even mention having anything to do with her other persona because, in the end, it was still a part of her that obviously meant a lot to her.

Maybe it’s time she’s returned the favor of undoubtedly trusting your best friend.

“ I think that’s a good idea. We need to talk.”


	7. you’re the only friend i need

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a lil talk results in happy times for the gays.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> full disclosure: until i can write out kryptonian correctly the words will just be written in english (i’ll add in when they’re said) ok read on <3

Kara looks down at her phone for what seems like the hundredth time, double-checking that she got the address of Lena’s hotel and suite number right. If anything, it only serves to stall for the inevitable awkwardness and tension that was sure to make itself known in their ‘talk’.

Taking a deep breath, she knocks three times on the wooden door, which probably cost more than what she made in a year.

A few seconds later, the door is unlocked, and Lena is in front of her, looking as gorgeous as ever. Her hair is down and she’s still in what seems to be work clothes, but her heels are off, the bags under her eyes darker than usual. Kara thinks she’d look the same, if she wasn’t so impervious to human affairs. She was in her ‘normal’ clothes, having changed as soon as she was near the building so Lena would be more comfortable.

Kara half-smiles, still working up the nerve to say something, clearing her throat lightly before trying to find a reasonable way to greet her… her… what exactly were they? She wondered silently.

“Hi, would you like to come in?” Lena asks, pulling Kara out of her reverie with a polite smile.

Kara nods dumbly, stepping into the room and shutting the door behind her. She observes her surroundings, noticing the disarray of papers on the kitchen counter. 

Lena seems to follow where her eyes go, “Sorry. There hasn’t been much time to organize my things yet. I’ve been out all day.” She shuffles her feet, looking ready to burst out of the room running and it hurts Kara, a lot. She knows that Lena isn’t one to bare her emotions, especially when someone she had trusted had so easily hurt her.

Playing with a loose thread hanging off the wrist of her jacket absentmindedly, Kara waves off her concerns ,” It’s okay. This is -uh- a nice room.” She tries complimenting Lena, but it ends up sounding lamer than she was hoping.

Lena chuckles, “Thank you.” Her tone turns gentler, “Would you like to talk on the couch?” 

Kara nods. It seems like couches are beginning to be the traditional place to have an intimate conversation between them. As she sits on the soft leather she sighs, gathering herself to try not to mess this up. This was the first time she’s spoken to Lena in the weeks since she’d left Kara’s apartment. 

Once Lena is situated on the other end Kara can’t take the silence any longer.

“I’m sorry, Lena.” 

Lena’s raises her eyebrows in bewilderment, “Oh.” is all she can seem to muster.

Kara doesn’t stop, too afraid she’ll chicken out before she can tell Lena all that’s been on her mind, “I’m sorry for lying to you and for making you believe that you weren’t worthy of the truth because, if anything, you are the most worthy.”

Lena’s mouth forms a small ‘o’ as she listens to her friend. Her gaze never leaving Kara, and then it’s her turn to respond.

“I actually wanted to talk to you about a realization I had today.” Her anxiousness becomes more apparent as she goes on, “I can understand why you didn’t want to tell me. It was for my own safety, though, who knows how much longer this would’ve gone on if not for me noticing your bruises.” She stares wistfully at the floor, resuming in a taut voice,“And yet... I can’t bring myself to stay mad at you when I remember all the times you’ve been there for me. You have never stopped believing in me, so why should I have ever stopped believing in you?” She lifts her eyes to meet Kara’s once more. 

Kara knows it was a rhetorical question, but how could she have ever brought herself to keep this part of her from Lena? She can easily think of what she would do if someone else had hurt Lena like this. 

So, she’s stunned, to say the least, gripping the side of the couch a little too tightly without meaning to and catches a ripping sound at her actions, hoping Lena didn’t hear it she gingerly smooths her hand over the newly formed tear. 

A grin makes its way to her face as Lena’s words finally settle in. She can’t say she’s entirely surprised at Lena’s overt kindness after only a month of knowing, unlike what others may see, Kara is used to Lena wearing her heart on her sleeve, and she’s entirely grateful that Lena seems to have kept her walls down, instead of building them back up since they’re relationship has come to a sort of stopping point. 

But still she can’t help asking, “You’re not mad?” 

Lena sighs, “I don’t know what I am. I just know that you still care about me and I still care about you and, for now, I think that’s enough.” She smiles softly at the blonde, her eyes widening suddenly like she just remembered something.

“Oh! I have a surprise for you.” She stands quickly, going over to her room and coming back with a worn down journal in hand

Kara stays sitting, watching her with amazement, wondering how she got so lucky to have someone as understanding as Lena in her life. She sits next to Kara again, opening the journal to a certain page, her eyes scan it before she finds what she was looking for. She holds up a finger, stopping Kara from asking what she’s doing.

“Hello” She says slowly, sounding out each letter with much effort.

At first, Kara is confused at whatever just came out of Lena’s mouth. It sounds familiar but not exactly in the way Kara can remember it. As she realizes what Lena has said to her, her hand covers her mouth in shock.

Lena said ‘Hello’ in Kryptonian. 

Feeling tears welling up in her eyes, she can barely get her words out, “H-How?’ Is all she can muster.

Lena smiles shyly, “ Since I’ve found out you’re Supergirl, I’ve been thinking back on all the times we’ve been together, both as Kara and Supergirl, and I remembered when you got attacked by psi. You said that in the nightmare she put you in you didn’t know Kryptonian. You didn’t really specify much else but that, so I knew it must've really hurt you, even if it wasn’t real,” She takes a deep breath, barely containing her excitement “So, I wanted to make sure you had other people around to speak it with. . I know it’s not perfect, but I’m trying.” 

“You’re learning Kryptonian for me?” 

“Yes.”

Kara can’t help but wrap Lena in a hug, letting the tears fall as she buries her face in her shoulder whispering, “Thank you so much.” 

Lena sounds slightly strained from the initial force, but replies, “Of course.” Her tone turns playful, “That’s what friends are for, right?” She strokes Kara’s hair, trying to soothe her cries.

Kara pulls away, her tears having subsided now, “I’ve never had a friend like you before.” She tells Lena, looking at her like she hung the stars and moon. 

Lena blushes, waving away her compliments, but Kara won’t let this monumental moment in their relationship slip away so quickly. 

She laces Lena’s hand in her own, thumb brushing over the brunette’s knuckles, “ Seriously, you know you don’t have to do this. It’s basically a dead language at this point. I mean, Clark can barely pronounce it, and he’s from there.” 

“I know I don’t have to learn it, but I want to.”

Kara gives her a grin that could rival the light of the sun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know the updates are slow, but i’m trying my best to put out stuff i’m proud of and that is good enough for you all so thanks in advance for being understanding! love y’all
> 
> *ignore the notes after these*


	8. play the game and lose it all

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the gays are happy...but for how long ???

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know i took almost a month for such a short update, but school is so stressful right now and i've had to get a lot of stuff done in such a short amount of time, but as christmas gets closer i will definitely have more time to write and give quicker updates!!! love you all and read on <3 (also no *real* kryptonian is written out...but i hope it's clear enough when they're actually speaking it)

“So, what do you think?”

Looking down at her figure and then up again to the mirror, Kara is amazed at how talented Lena is. She runs her fingertips over the soft material that makes up the House of El crest on her chest in a dazed manner, not wanting to get any more emotional than she already feels. 

She tries to shake them off, “I love it. Especially the pants!” She informs Lena, sticking a leg out for emphasis, only causing Lena to break her confused look into a laugh, muttering something that only Kara's super hearing could catch onto.

“How the hell did I never realize you were Kara?” 

Kara chooses to ignore the remark, looking back into the mirror and fixing her newly cut bangs with a new sense of self. Lena told her that she had been working on the new suit for weeks now, and every time Kara tried to sneak into her lab she was shooed away with promises that she “just needed to make a few tweaks.” She didn’t know that a few “tweaks” meant adding an entirely new component to her suit, but she wasn’t complaining.

She hears the familiar crackle of Alex’s voice in her right ear, “Supergirl, there’s an assault happening downtown. We need you out there now.”

Sighing, Kara turns to Lena, who’s staring at her with an amused grin, “I guess that’s your cue, Supergirl” She lifts a finger up to the sky and Kara nods, smiling ear to ear before pivoting to turn away with a final wave to the brunette. 

________________

Later that evening Kara went to visit Lena for their nightly lessons in learning Kryptonian. Lena was a much faster learner than Kara had anticipated, but it wasn’t that much of a surprise given her already knowing five other languages, so what was one more, right? 

Hovering over her balcony, she flew to a stop and lightly tapped a finger on the glass pane. As she waited for Lena to allow her inside she couldn’t help but feel a sense of deja vu from the last time she had come to Lena’s home, albeit in a more unannounced manner. She’s glad she was in a better place (who knew therapy could actually help? not Kara that’s for sure).

With a graceful landing she steps inside, shrugging off her cape as usual and folding it neatly to place it on a chair in Lena’s kitchen. Lena leads them both into the living room where she has her journal for note taking and some other documents Kara had brought from the Fortress of Solitude. 

“Can you tell me the sentence we learned yesterday?” Kara tests Lena as they both settle into the couch for the next few hours, an eyebrow raised, but not in an intimidating manner. It’s more of a Hey, it’s okay if you can’t type of expression.

Lena nods but looks anxious anyways, “Hello, how are you doing today?” She asks Kara, the vowels and consonants leaving her throat with little fight, and Kara can’t help feeling like she’s going to cry again. So, all she does is clear her throat before telling Lena, with a slight voice crack, that she’s proud of her.

Hours pass and before the two can even notice, it’s nearing midnight. As she observes the mess of papers on the coffee table, Kara sips from the cup of tea that Lena had graciously made for her a few minutes earlier and contemplates wrapping the lessons up and flying home. Lena is still mulling over the new nouns she was taught, and Kara feels fortunate to be able to experience Lena, the real Lena, the one who has her hair down and her smudged reading glasses on because she was “too lazy to get up” and actually put on her contacts, but still jumped at the chance to make them both drinks when Kara had melodramatically complained that she needed some sustenance to keep her going. The one that was in her sweatpants and National City University sweatshirt and didn’t care that she has accidentally spilled some of the aforementioned tea on it. That was the Lena that Kara loved (no homo though)

She takes the opportunity to test Lena’s ability to understand Kryptonian once again. Tapping her shoulder gently, Kara tries to direct her attention away from the papers, “What is it?” Lena asks under her breath, still not meeting Kara’s eyes as she pushes up her glasses to read another sentence from their lessons. Kara rolls her eyes at how studious Lena is, but leans forwards and the action seems to catch Lena off guard because Kara hears her breath hitch. 

She’s not sure what possesses her to move even closer, but she does. Coming face to face with those mesmerizing green eyes and holding the contact for much longer than necessary. Lena still doesn’t say anything, and Kara swears that she glances down at her lips for just a second, no more and no less but it happened.

She clears her throat at an attempt to fill the heavy tension now resting between the two locked in a staring contest of sorts. 

“I’m going home” Kara tells Lena, the Kryptonian words feeling empty now because all her brain is telling her is:

Look at Lena’s lips 

Look at Lena’s lips 

Look Lena’s lips 

Loo-

“Wait, what?” Lena interrupts Kara’s (very important) train of thought.

“What?” Kara parrots, not moving an inch.

Lena blinks, seeming to realize their compromising position, and backs away from Kara at record speed, much to her dismay. She pushes her glasses up from their precarious position on the bridge of her nose and clears her throat lightly, looking at Kara with an unreadable expression that only serves to make Kara anxious as to what exactly was happening a few seconds before hand.

“You- You said you were going home?” Lena stutters out the question in a meek voice, a weak attempt at changing the subject that Kara inevitably falls for because it’s Lena. 

“Yeah, It’s getting late and I just thought…” She trails off before it settles into her mind that Lena had fully understood what she had said in Kryptonian, “ Wait, you understood what I said?” She asks, a smile growing on her face before she can even register the nod Lena gives in return.

Without a second thought, Kara goes to hug Lena, who lets out a huff at the sudden force. Kara laughs slightly at her actions and softens her grip on Lena in response. “I am so proud of you, Lena.” 

Lena’s eyes widen slightly at the praise, her mind still reeling from what Kara has just seemed to brush off as nothing of importance. “Uh, yeah of course. Thank you?” The second part coming out as more of a question than any sense of gratitude and Kara still feels oblivious as to why. Retracting her body soon after the impromptu hug is initiated, Kara is still beaming at Lena who is seeming to look anywhere but Kara herself.

Lena yawns awkwardly, in a manner that Kara has never seen and is almost immediately pushing the heroine away to tell her she’s tired and ready to sleep. Kara tilts her head, puzzled at her sudden change in demeanor, but doesn’t fight against Lena actually advocating getting a good night’s rest for once. 

“I guess I’ll head out now…” She trails off, chewing her bottom lip absentmindedly before asking, “Are you sure you’re okay?” She tugs her cape back on and smooths out her new suit as she walks towards the balcony once again. The night sky stares back at her and she can’t help but feel like she’s missing something. 

Lena gives her tight lipped smile, the crinkles that usually form not evident, and Kara feels her heart fall at their absence. 

“I’m fine. You go on. We can talk tomorrow, right?” 

The tension leaves her as she looks at Lena and makes the promise that she always vows to keep, “Of course. I’m here for you. Always”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading. if you comment or give a kudos i'll give you an imaginary cookie for being so cool.
> 
> *ignore the notes after these*

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading :D i appreciate any kudos or comments because they give me that sweet validation!! 
> 
> the next chapter should be up fairly soon. it’s basically done, just need to tweak it a little bit AND the rest will be supercorp as adults with longer chapters. 
> 
> ok love y’all byeee <3


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